Feeling a bit hamster-ish

sunset in the bronx

Here it is November 13th. Just mere days until the celebration of my birth. There are a group of us in the family starting in August that turn the same age each year. It’s kind of sweet. This year seems to have sped by at a breakneck pace with its challenges and joys. More on that in a few weeks as I Ponder 2014 and face 2015.

A few days ago I received an email regarding this post-Quilt Market couple of weeks with my response being “feeling like a hamster in one of those wheels”. Some periods of time just feel like that. I’ve felt like this since August. I have accomplished a few really good things since August but they’ve been at the expense of other things. That happens. While I feel like a slacker at some of this, I’m probably not any more than anyone else.
I woke up with : “Closer To Your Heart” Natalie Grant

Here I am once again,
crying out on the floor.
Trying to make sense
of this emptiness, once more.

I can’t do this on my own.
I’m in too deep,
I should have known.
I know You made me for
so much more than this.

I’ve been running so fast,
trying to get back to the start.
I’ve been holding so tight,
but it all just comes apart.
Pull me in, break me down,
make me new and bring me

Closer to Your heart, heart, heart, heart, heart [x2]

Help me be unafraid,
find my place where You are.
Oh, You’ve always been enough,
You’re the light in the dark.

Afraid of giving up control,
You are there, but I let go.
You’re taking this brokenness,
making it beautiful.

I’ve been running so fast,
trying to get back to the start.
I’ve been holding so tight,
but it all just comes apart.
Pull me in, break me down,
make me new and
bring me closer to Your

Heart [x5]

Oh oh, make me come clean.
Oh oh, You’re all I need.
Oh oh, bring me closer to
Your heart, heart, heart.
Closer to Your heart, heart, heart, heart, heart.

I’ve been running so fast,
trying to get back to the start.
I’ve been holding so tight,
but it all just comes apart.
Pull me in, break me down,
make me new and bring
me closer to Your heart, heart, heart, heart, heart.
Closer to You’re heart, heart, heart, heart, heart.
Closer to You’re heart, heart, heart, heart.

Ponder 1“I’ve been running so fast” looping over and over through my mind kind of like an annoying ear worm but giving me information. There’s a lot to do and I want to do it all well. But like that hamster I feel like I’m not accomplishing anything. Except the hamster is accomplishing something…expending built up energy and becoming fit. I have been accomplishing things…just not the BIG things that need to get done. And I’m realizing that priorities need to shift some.

Maybe it’s not the priorities that need to shift as much as how I manage those priorities. It’s all in the details right? I was freaking out a bit last night about some of the priorities and decided to reach out to a friend. She uses a timer set to 10 minutes…does what she can in those ten minutes then does something else for a little bit. I think this kind of thing will help, particularly in the short term. 10 – 2o minutes are manageable time periods that will make sense and it’s something I already encourage quilters to do.

it’s also about managing what crops up along the way. Things happen. Priorities need to shift. There is a gift in learning how to be flexible. There is a gift in learning to roll with it. Being on the wheel, running full speed then does accomplish something, it gives me time to think about how I can do things better, how do I honor God in this process?

I think quilting is teaching me a lot: flexible and forgiving; enjoy the process and learn from things I consider mistakes. No wait, I know that quilting is teaching me a lot: slowing down, being patient with myself. Sometimes it’s important to get on that hamster wheel and focus deeply and intently on one big project and get off to focus on the little stuff.

Time to go focus on some small stuff before some major big stuff.

God bless!

Teri

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One thought on “Feeling a bit hamster-ish

  1. Teri, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed with so much on your plate: each priority calling out to be your top priority. Please know that your quilt sisters have you in our thoughts and prayers and that The Lord always walks beside you, ready to carry you and your burdens at a moments notice. We love you, Happy Birthday!

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