Today starts a little bit differently. We greet the Lord as a Great King, carpeting the road with Palm branches, as one would. There is something in the human spirit, in that moment that recognized the Truth of the Experience of Jesus. Perhaps, as often is the case, some joined the crowd so as not to be left out. And now here we are, over 2000 years later pretty much in the same place: honoring Jesus as our King (the crowds at Church will swell greatly over this week) and by the end of Easter, in one way or another we will walk away from Him, perhaps a few will run. And over the last few weeks I’ve been thinking, once again, about how to embrace him more deeply, with more gratitude for Life in all it’s glorious messiness.
This morning I had a dream that the final words spoken, “because Jesus!” still ring in my ears. In the dream I was with friends from long ago, there were four of us walking away from something. One friend grabbing my hand to pull me away with him. I pulled my hand away declaring that I needed to go back from whence we ran, “because Jesus!” And then I woke up. Because Jesus is reason enough.
And today, I’m reminded more deeply that being part of a crowd is never quite enough. Because crowds don’t always behave well, or kindly. I’m willing to reevaluate those relationships which do not bring life. And I’m willing to be grateful for the ones that don’t for they have something beautiful and rich to teach. That we all are, in some way, broken. And that brokenness should bring compassion for the other even when things are not ideal. Because Jesus!
And deeply and profoundly I know that in the quilting world one deep call I experience is to affirm the beauty of womanhood, of the skills we bring to the larger community, of the economy of sharing, and building up. I can see a young woman who said she was “just” this. The focus shift from “just” to I am this. And that even though she’s not That, This is a good thing as it places us in a place of learning to be That.
I have this conversation a lot. I do not know if it makes a difference long term however that is not for me to know. What is for me to know is that I listen to the prompting of the Spirit and speak a deeper truth, that being a woman is good and holy, that we deserve to see our self as good and holy, that there is room to grow. And it is in that room to grow where I find myself. I am seeing right now, an area to grow which reveal in itself something difficult and challenging. But, like learning how to machine quilt there is a process. Learning to machine quilt requires something of a deep passion, a commitment to learning the ins and outs, learning about how machines work, how needles and thread and batting and the inner workings of my brain figure things out. It requires a commitment to practice and accept that things are going to be ugly at the beginning of the process. It requires trying things, taking risks and learning how to be more deeply who I am as a quilt maker. Because Jesus!